Some pictures from the past week.

Sweet little Paigie. She is almost always content and happy. She brings so much peace to my life.
I got Jackson to look at me by asking him what was on my face.
This is what he would do when I asked him to actually look at me. Little stinker.
Helping his dad. When D is around J has to be right at his side.
He couldn't climb to the roof with Dada so he just stood at the bottom of the ladder and "held" it.

Too much love?

Last Sunday I was getting ready for church and I could hear Jackson screaming. At first I paid no attention and then I realized that it was not coming from downstairs where Douglas was keeping an eye on him. It was also too muted to be from an open room. I poked my head out the door and noticed that Paige's door was adjar. She was asleep so I quickly went to her room where I found Jackson in her crib jumping up and down and screaming. Paige was at the opposite end of the crib, turned around with a blanket over her head. She was as content as can be. Ahhhh. What am I going to do with him?

As a solution I went and bought some of those door knob things that make it hard to open the doors. That worked for about two minutes. That boy.

We have been having problems with J taking his diaper off in his crib again. I had tried everything. The best part is that he would take the diaper off and put his pj bottoms back on--poopy butt or not. Sounds nasty? It is. It infuriates me. So, my solution, take his crib apart and make him sleep in his bed. Needless to say, it has been a LONG few days. There was so much tension in our house yesterday that even Paige was affected by it. She did not want to nurse last night. It took me about 45 minutes sitting outside with her to get her to calm enough to eat. Of course the climax of the night that set all this off was JAckson taking his poopy diaper off at bedtime and walking in to find little soft poo logs all of his floor. I pretty much lost it. Jackson knew better than to get of his bed for the next little while. I wish it had lasted, but once I got it shampooed out and he was back in bed, it was back to up and down, banging on the baby gate and trying to convince us that "I need to puke" (said in the most pathetic voice a two year old can muster) or "I need to go potty."

And on to that, Thursday night we put Jackson to bed and of course he wouldn't stay in bed. We just ignore him. Until...he starts bawling. I go up there to find him, his bed, the floor all covered in throw up. The first time he has ever thrown up. It was a long night. The best part though was how manipulative he was with it the next day. Everytime I would try to get him to do something he didn't want to, he would pull the "I need to puke" (again said in the most pathetic voice). After about half a day of this I lost my sympathy and told him, "okay, puke then." He has tried to pull that one a few times today, but hasn't gotten to far with it. Hasn't he heard the story of crying wolf.

So, for all of you feeling jealous of my life, I'm sorry you can't all be as lucky as I am. Last night was one of those nights where I contemplate how I can get out of this whole parenting business. There is no escape I concluded.

Anyway, another day and hope has returned. It is so nice having Douglas here to help with things.

I grow em big!

Paige had her two month appt. and shots today. She weighed 14 pound 8 ounces. She is 98% for weight, 89% for height and 93% for head size. She is well proportioned, but big!

She hated her shots. It took me a good 10 minutes to settle her down. Jackson never even cried when he got shots so this was a shock to me. She also spit up her roto virus vaccine. It was delightful.

Another Week

Dang, I have a hard time thinking of titles for my posts. Pretty lame, I know. It is late and I know I should go feed the baby and go to bed. I was tired, grouchy and emotional today and it honestly has been a while since I have felt like this. I think part of it is that I went to the gym late last night, didn't enjoy one minute of it, weighed myself (depressing) and went to bed late...hmmm, that seems to be a pattern lately. Douglas has been so swamped with work with school starting tomorrow and he comes home exhausted and goes to bed early. It should slow down a little for him tomorrow, but I know there are still a lot of loose ends to tie up on different jobs. I sort of feel like we have been coexisting lately. I stay up so late and he gets up so early, and we don't spend time together like I am used to doing. I know it is a phase, but sometimes it is hard to remember that in the moment. Paige is doing pretty well sleeping so I know that soon enough she will be going to bed at 7pm and getting up around 7am with no feeding in between. Won't that be the day!

I am going to start a new paragraph since I have issues with following post that have too long of paragraphs. That is my laziness I guess. Here are a few highlights from the past week...

1. Ordered my new computer--hooray. this puppy should be FAST and be able to handle my workload. Can't wait.

2. Sold my accord. Sad to see it go, happy to have the Pilot. We are really blessed.

3. Shot another wedding. Always a good learning experience. Some things went really well, others could have gone better. All in all I am pleased with the experience. I got a lot of exposure and that is great for my business.

4. Actually finished the ironing for the week. I am not as iron crazy as some :) yet I strive to keep up with it. I often fail. I do still have a laundry basket of folded clothes sitting down here and mine on my bedroom floor. baby steps.

5. Made way too many batched of chocolate chip cookies...my new obsession. I justify it because JAckson loves to help me cook. Right....

6. Went back to working in nursery. I forgot how boring grown up classes can be. Left the baby with my mom and went in. Crazy as usual. I actually picked up one of the crying kids (which those who know me understand that is unusual...don't like others' crying kids). She actually stopped crying when I was holding her.

7. Bought lots of baby food at Target (see this post). I mean lots....

8. Had my first round of laser hair removal. Hurt like a mother.

Okay, that is about it. Not too exciting, I know. Jackson has been relatively happy and easy lately and it has been so great. He is so good at saying thank you now and it often catches me off guard. Tonight is night one of "Operation lose the binkie". I'll let you know how it goes. He has a new favorite movie "Lord of the Beans" which is a vege tail--one of those Christian videos. They are actually really cute although he was taught that the Father, Son and Holy Ghost are One being. Ahhh, he is too young to get it anyway, right?

As I said I went to the gym last night. I am undecided if I will go again any time soon. There is a part of me that so desperately wants to lose the Paigie weight and another part of me that is too tired to care. I am having a hard time coming to terms with this issue. The real question is why am I so obsessed about it?? I hate that. Why can't I be easy going about anything?

Paige is a sweet little thing. She is content most of the time, naps well, smiles a lot, coos. I love it. I love to hold her over my shoulder after she finishes eating and just enjoy the peacefulness of babyhood. I am enjoying her so much more than I did Jackson. Jackson was so easy too, but I was much more uptight. With Paige I just don't worry 'quite' as much. I still worry, but on a lesser scale I guess.

Got to empty the dishwasher and reload it. I can't stand waking up to a dirty kitchen. The clutter bugs me, but dirty dishes--depressing. Bad way to start of a day. Too bad it is already 11pm.

Here are weekly pics of Paige and J man. I love his smile.

Oh, and I am enjoying book three of the Twighlight vampire series. Still cheesy, but enjoyable. Why do I find myself wishing she would pick Jacob. There is so much more substance to their relationship? anyone with me?

The pee-pee doll was well worth...

the $50 I spent on it. It was great for potty training Jackson, but who knew it would provide him so much entertainment now. He can play with that thing for hours. I LOVE IT.

The light at the end of the tunnel....

I will probably curse myself for writing this, but 4 days straight Paige has slept from anywhere between 4:30am and 6:00am. (tears of happiness are now brimming in my eyes).

Weekly pics

I love this smile. You should see Jackson try to get her to smile. Actually, I am going to try to record it. It is scary and oh so funny. He is having some issues in the smiling department. So, I have this new idea that I am going to try to take a picture of the kids each Sunday to track their growth. We will see how many weeks I last with that one.
Paige is the best little baby. She slept from 10 to 5 last night. Hallelujah. Unfortunately it probably won't happen again tonight, but one can hope. She is always a happy little thing. I can't believe how much she has chubbied up. Do you think she looks like either of us?
And here is the reason I am not sure how long this picture this will last...Jackson. I totally bribed him to sit here for this picture, but notice he wouldn't actually hold on to Paige. Also, he has a smile only a mother could love. I never realized that smiling is a learned skill. Jackson was on a rampage this weekend. I tried to let him be a big boy and wear pull ups at night. Bad idea...every night he took it off, put his pj pants back on and I woke up to him crying in the middle of the night and his bed, and all his bedding soaked. This happened two nights in a row. Ahhhh...it is bad enough getting up to feed, but to change sheets, no thanks. Last night he did it to be a stinker. At about 9pm he was still up. We went in and he had thrown out all of the things he didn't want nasty and then peed in the crib. A little deliberate? I would say so. We have now threatened to take away the bink (yes, he still sleeps with a binky at night--not ready to fight that battle). That threat should work. He is petrified to lose the binkie.

Jackson also flushed his underwear down the toilet yesterday and Douglas found him right after he attempted to do the same with his shorts. The undies made it down, the shorts, no--luckily. That kid is going to be the end of me. Am I going to survive the two year old stage. Praytell it gets better or I am going to be loony before this ends. Oh, and now he pees on the potty like "daddy". He devised this himself--climbs on the seat, puts his knees on it facing the lid, leans his head on the lid and aims down. Kind of ingenious actually, but WHAT? Don't even get me started on the germ aspect of all of this. I am just envisioning a public restroom. NASTY.

J is a TOTAL daddy's boy these days. In fact, if D is home, J wants nothing to do with me. I don't complain...hehe. It is when the weekend ends and Jackson is calling for dada to get him up. I show up and he is not happy. Sorry buddy, this is as good as it gets when dad is gone. D is so good with he though. They sit and play and watch movies together. They love to pillow fight which mainly consists of D pelting J with pillow, J falling over and cracking up. Guys are so weird.

Well, another week is upon us. I made this profound statement to Douglas for which he is still making fun of me. I know what I meant. I said, "life is so...life" meaning that is just happens. Most of the time it is the same old thing, but for some reason it brings us so much happiness. When we talk about the kids after they go to sleep it is so easy to realize why we love them. God was smart when he made the last time we see our children when they sleep. There is something so peaceful about a sleeping child.

I guess I should feed my kid breakfast. Life.

Paige

So, I have been meaning to take these pictures since we blessed Paige--6 weeks later I finally got to it. I was glad I did because her arms barely fit in the sleeves--little chubbet. Of course, there is this time period between about 2 weeks and when a baby sits where pictures just don't do the child justice. They always looks all scrunched. That is why I always tell people to get their baby photographed within the first two weeks. Anyway, the first day I tried to get some pics she cried. She never cries and she was unhappy. They learn early to hate the photo session thing.
Don't you love the little smile? She always smiles with her tongue out and I think it is so cute. I am biased, yes I realize. Do you know how hard it is to try to get your child to smile and get an in focus picture at the same time??? Hard. Most of the pictures she was half cut off (trying to take it without looking through it).
And while I am taking the pictures and neglecting my two year old he manages to go outside in my shoes, underware and one of his non play clothes shirts, turn the hose on and spray the whole porch and back windows, cover his shirt in red dirt and get into trouble. And he does all this while shuffling around in my sandals. What a maniac. I should have learned my lesson when he, in the three minutes my mom was gone, filled the large container of dog food with water which consequently molded and was thrown out. I should learn. Don't ever leave him alone.

and so my life goes...

I should so be in bed right now...

why oh why...

can't I keep my house clean. Even for a little while. I mean, I really want it clean, but I swear as fast as I get some things organized, a tornado has blown through and messed it up. I want it clean, I really do, but I just don't have the energy to get it that way.

I guess the fact that I spent the afternoon tired, lying on the couch, reading "N is for Noose" by Sue Grafton, didn't help the process. I wanted to get the laundry done and managed two loads, one of which is still sitting in the washer.

I did go to see "Hairspray" with my mom. I really enjoyed it, although it is definitely a girlie movie. I don't think Douglas would have enjoyed it much and he is pretty open minded.

I went to Vegas on Saturday to bra shop. Many of you know this trial in my life and consequently, Nordstrom is the only store that carries my size (that I know of). Little did I know it was the Semi Annual sale and it was PACKED. We were very successful though (my mom went with me and Paige--J man stayed at home with Douglas). I found pants that actually fit me so that I can stop wearing the maternity capris Sarah lent me that never actually fit while I was pregnant. Granted, they are a little larger that I would like to fit into, but they fit. I also found some CUTE clothes at Janie and Jack for great prices. Gotta love that. How come I can drop large quantities of moola on clothes for my kiddos, but I feel tremendously guilty when I spend it on myself? We had a fun time and I realized that it is probobly good that there is no shopping here in town. I would get in trouble if there was.

Life is crazy as always. It is time for Paige to drop her first feeding. Last night I went in when she cried after three hours and gave her the bink. She went back to sleep for an hour and when I fed her, she ate very little...snacking. That along with her size leads me to believe that she can do it. It may require me binking her a few times, but I am going to give it a shot tonight. I will let you know if I am successful. Keep your fingers crossed. I really need to start sleeping again.

What is the deal with it being overcast and yucky here, but having no rain. That annoys me.

I need to go to bed. Today has truly been an unproductive day. Hooray!

Fashionista

Paige is sporting the newest trend in headband fashion.

a few of the kiddies.

Jackson loves to wear his "silly socks". What a weirdo. These days when I tell him to smile, this is what I get. So not cute, but it still CRACKS me up to see this face. What a goof.

Jane's bridals.

Haven't had much time to play with these yet, but this was one of my favs and I had to try it out.

Isn't this ingenious??

Saw this in real simple magazine and I want it. I love the crusty part of brownies...mmmm.

I love my chubby babies!

I took Paige to the Dr. today to have her PKU test redone. I asked if we could pop her on the scale while we were at it. She was 12 pounds 11 ounces! What a chunk. Of course she had clothes on so you have to subtract a little, but I am so proud of my chubby baby. I love when my kiddos start to chub up! I love the rolls in their legs, the chubby cheek, the double chin. Paige has it all. I also love that it means a good night sleep is in the near future. Let's hope at least!

taking care of the kiddos

I read an article about carcinogens (?) found in baby products. I am usually not one to jump on this band wagon, but when it comes to my kids I would rather side on caution than not. Anyway, I was amazed at all the grocery store products that had this chemical in it. Also, I needed some sort of gel to tame Paige's fly away hair. So, after a little research I found this product line. I really like it.

Going private...

Some have expressed concern with the fact that I have a public blog so just to be safe I have decided to go private. All are invited to view, it will just require that you sign in first. I attempted to do this before, but didn't realize that I needed email addresses to do so. If you are interested on being on the "invited" list email me at info@staciashaw.com and I will add you. I will keep my blog open until next Sundayish and then I will attempt to get all the emails entered and switch over.

Paigie's blessing

four generations
my grandma and paige

I have been way behind on pictures, but caught up a little tonight. Here are some of Paige's blessing pictures at two weeks old. Her blessing dress was made by my Grandma some 60+ years ago. The buttons on the back are from her mother's wedding dress. She made this during WWII and at the time fabric was hard to come by so she paid a decent amount for this fabric. Also, she had no sewing machine so she stitched it all by hand. My aunts and mom as well as some of my cousins and myself were blessed in this dress.

good fun at the shaw house.

just watching the boob tube in undies, and crocs with sippie in hand.

loving his sis-sometimes too much.

Fun with cousins.

don't you love the butt cleavage??

We had a great 4th. My brother Marlan and sister in law Sally and their girls were here to visit. We kept busy and the kids had a blast. I wonder if I could by another two year old to keep Jackson company all the time.

here you go...

I forgot how bad point and shoots can make skin look especially close up. She is cute though--huh?

--notice how lazy I was--didn't even get rid of the red eye. I need to shoot some with my real camera so they look cuter.

sleeping/feeding challenges...

The last week has been full of sleeping problems and I find my self exhausted, emotional, grumpy, patienceless, and sometimes angry. Paige is a little mixed when it comes to sleeping and it is killing me. She can go 3+ hours all day between feeds, but at night, she is waking up every 2ish hours, eating very little and passing out again. I then spend the next half hour trying to get her to wake up and eat to no avail. When I get back to bed and asleep I have an hour before it starts again. In the morning I can think it all through and realize that she is waking up before she is ready to eat and that I need to get her back to sleep without feeding her, but at night I am so tired that I can't quite think it all through that well. Anyway, I am now resolved to break this bad habit that we have gotten into...I need to or I will not survive.

On to the feeding.I am a real routine person. I feed my babies, keep them awake and then put them to sleep. It works quite well. The problem with Paige is that she does not want to eat every three hours. In fact, she will eat very little and go back to sleep or simply refuse to eat more. Of course this also totally stresses me out as I want things to run according to plan and she doesn't. What to do.

On a good note, she is fattening up quite well. Her cheeks are so chubby now, I almost don't recognize her as the baby I brought home. She is pretty content most of the time and has started smiling at me. There is nothing like a baby's first gummy smiles.

On another negative note...I still fit into none of my clothes. I can't find any that fit me either. I guess the solution is to stay inside all the time.

Anyway, that is it for griping. I forgot how hard this first stage is. I know I am nearing the end of it and as sad as it is to see my little baby grow, I am ready for it.

What do you do when you are tired, bored, exhausted etc??

I like to shop for kids clothes. Don't ask me why, but it is theraputic. Look what I found yesterday...I am still debating whether I will actuallky buy it, but I love it!

Double Stroller

So, I still have yet to decide on a double stroller other than realize that I do indeed need one. What do you all know about the sit and stand strollers?

What a cute little bum. Isn't her little crack funny. It is a Y shape.

It is quiet on the homefront!

Two kids napping. How peaceful. It doesn't last long enough though. It would be even more peaceful if my house was in order, but alas, I am yet to figure out how to get much of anything done during the day. Now I admit, I have never been the neatest person--I tend to get distracted by what ever project I am working on, but I typically go to bed with a clean kitchen and make it through breakfast before the chaos sets in. Lately, however, I am too dang tired to care (enough) to get it cleaned up. Also, I am back to having a million baby gadgets all over the house--swing, car seat, blanket, burp cloths, binkies, laundry. You name it. I had forgotten how much stuff comes with a little one.

And, I had forgotten how good chips ahoy cookies are. My lil bro left a Costco size box at our house and I have had little restraint as I polished off the second package in a matter of days. Comfort eating, right. I think sometimes I eat because it is the only thing in my life that I can control at the moment and dang, it feels good to do that. I am usually not this way, but being tired takes out the willpower and makes me not really care. Actually, I think I am going to go get a couple more...writing about them makes me hungry for some. Last pack..thank heavens. You know sometimes it is easier just to finish whatever it is off so that you can alleviate the guilt that goes along with doing it. You know, when there is just one (rather large) piece of cake left and you can either eat it in a few pieces and feel guilty each time, or just eat it all at once, feel guilty and get it over with. Am I alone in this?

We had a successful trip to the splash pad today. Jackson loves it and it wears him out so he takes a long nap. Gotta love that. I tell myself that I am going to take him every day, but much of the time I can't get my act together.

I am having real issues with typing. Usually my brain works faster than my fingers, but today my fingers are moving a little too fast and my brain can't keep up. I am having to hit the backspace a lot.

Paige slept her first 5 hour stretch last night. I wish I had too, but it still gives me hope. Can you believe she is a month today. Time passes too fast (and yet not fast enough when I want to be sleeping through the night again.)

Got the majority of the baby announcements sent out. That is a relief.

Can't wait to see family for the holiday. It is always fun to get together with my siblings. I wish we lived closer, but I guess it is good we don't because I would have no reason to make non blood friends and that would be sad because I so enjoy my friends.

Well, seeing how I can't think of anything else even semi interesting to write about, I will write again another time.

Which looks better?

The one with the really white background or the other?

Just a quick post to say "hi"

I have but two minutes before the dairy is back in service so I thought I would jot a quick entry. Life is crazy in the Shaw house. Everything is turned upside down and everything that was "normal" is a little less than that. I keep weird hours, eat weird things, sleep whenever I can, act like I am keeping house, try to be a good mom to a two year old and have some sort of relationship with my husband. It is amazing how I forgot what this time was all about. I mean, I can't even remember what I felt with Jackson. I am just glad that it won't last forever.

Then, at the same time the thought of my sweet little Paigie growing up makes me want to cry (or actually cry depending on the time of day). There is something so heavenly about a newborn. I wonder what she thinks and dreams. I wonder if she knows who I am and who her family is. I wonder who she will grow up to be. I don't doubt that the veil is thin for her. There is just something so amazing about being trusted with one of God's children.

So, I try to enjoy this time even though I run on auto pilot. And I realize that two years from now my memories will be really clouded and I might even consider doing it again.

My kids.

That is so weird...I have KIDS.

Jackson loves his Baby Paige

Just playing around with some pictures...

Robyn, this one is for you...

Baby Blessing

We are going to bless Paige next Saturday, June 16th at 11:00am at my Grandma's. We are capitalizing on having both sets of grandparents here so that is why we are doing it so soon. We would love to have any family and friends come. We will have a little brunch afterwards.

Sweet little Paige

 

 

 

Jackson meeting Baby Paige

 

 

 

my little family...

A few more of Baby Paige

She's Here!

Paige Christine
June 1, 2007
4:15 a.m.
7 pounds 12 ounces
20 inches